Permit me a moment to brag. If I don't toot my own horn a little, who will? I'll toss on a rant for good measure. I've been featured on some alternative news podcasts and radio shows before; however, recently I got a little "love" from Discovery News when they linked to my blog from this article:
http://news.discovery.com/human/psychology/newtown-school-board-shuts-down-conspiracy-theorists-140511.htm
As it is, this is the first time my work was recognized by a somewhat “main stream” press. I like that. I want real Sandy Hook research out there; I think it is important to get it right. My series of videos, Sandy Hook: The Deadliest Minute are factual and report based looks into the Sandy Hook shooting that has sliced through the misinformation, filled in the gaps, and answered many questions. You will not find these answers anywhere else; because thus far, no one else has taken the time to look through the report and piece it together. I found the puzzle pieces fit together quite nicely as it came together.
My work has been viewed by people who know first hand the reality of the war crime perpetrated upon that elementary school; I've appreciated their confidential, positive comments.
Make no mistake ladies and gentlemen. Adam Lanza, the shooter, shot his way into the school. His first victims were principal Dawn Hochsprung, Mary Sherlach, and Natalie Hammond. Hochsprung and Sherlach were shot dead. He then entered the office while a wounded Natalie Hammond dragged herself into a conference room and leaned against the door. Finding no one to shoot in the office, he quickly exited the office and again stood over Sherlach and Hochsprung, firing at point blank range into their bodies. He then entered room 10, opening fire. Two children hid in the restroom; others escaped and ran up the road. In total 5 children died from Room 10 and both teachers. The shooter then then entered Room 8, catching an entire classroom attempting to huddle in a small restroom. The shooter opened fire on that group, unloading 80 rounds in under two minutes. He shot his victims from a very close range, usually 4-5 feet away, sometimes closer.
My research is named “The Deadliest Minute” because Adam’s time in Room 8 was the deadliest minute in civilian mass shooting history. In fact, no other “minute” comes close. To find something close would require the study of war time massacres or 3rd world village raids.
After he was satisfied all were dead in Room 8, he exited and began to head in the direction of other classes. He then suddenly retreated to Room 10. He fired out the windows, dropped the rifle, and soon put a pistol to his head; finishing his attack as he had likely planned, by ending his own life.
A deafening silence, the smell of blood, and the smell of gun power hung in the air. An entire school had listened to the massacre over the loud speaker and were hiding in their classrooms. Six educators and Eighteen children were dead on the scene with wounds incompatible with life. There was no treating them, no saving them. Their bodies devastated by multiple rifle bullets. On scene paramedics somberly performed the task of legal presumptions of death for those victims in accordance with mass casualty protocol as directed by Danbury Hospital. Two other children, a boy and a girl, were mortally wounded. These children were carried by first responding officers to waiting ambulances. The EMT's and Paramedics performed Advance Life Support measures; however, the children succumbed to their injuries and were declared dead at Danbury Hospital. Total casualties for December 14, 2012 are well known: Twenty first graders dead. Six teachers dead. Two teachers wounded. The shooter was dead. The shooters mother found dead at her home. He shot her 4 times in the head.
The State Police and the Office of the Chief Medical Examiner made it a priority to get the bodies of the victims to their families as quickly as possible, and by about 1 pm the next day, those bodies were released to funeral homes, and therefore those families. The first funerals were held soon thereafter. A small town, stricken with grief, struggled to cope with burying the teachers and children they knew so well, while scores of press crews descended upon them. A "vulture-ish" press, eager for a story, any story, whether true, exaggerated, or blatantly incorrect, published their stories.
These are the facts. The water gets a little muddy from there.
Enter the Hoaxer: Countless incorrect reports by negligent press sparked a conspiracy. Amateur video makers and bloggers combed every news video and article
looking for any ambiguity, any moment of perceived irregularity or
inconsistency, any momentary action that didn't fit within their own definition of "grief", and seized upon in a “Holy Grail” type fashion. Snipping it, editing it, and looping it
repeatedly; the like minded parroted and echoed it and it spread, reaching lore status. When hoaxers were unsatisfied with mere
irregularity, they fraudulently invented new ones from whole cloth.
Government and private actions taken to in a good faith attempt to protect the families helped stoked the fire. The Connecticut State Police left questions unanswered. A shocked, saddened nation heaped money and goods, in that direction, wanting to help. Where money goes, suspicious motive will follow. Political causes were undertaken by some in the town, adding to the conspiracy theories. Firearms laws were passed and pressed; this fact alone can serve as a contentious issue. Today the fire was rages for a second event, this new event called “Sandy Hoax”. Sandy Hoax has nothing to do with the shooting."Sandy Hoax" is a contrived invention with a life of it's own.
The Huffington Post calls these Hoaxers "Truthers"; much like calling a giant person “Tiny”, the term “truther” couldn’t be farther from the truth; in fact that term should never be used. They are "hoaxers” and they are the snake oil salesmen of our time, selling lies and distort truth. My channel and some other channels debunk them and expose their lies and fraud. Recently I exposed the leadership of two main hoaxer groups, Sandy Hook Hoax and Sandy Hook Justice, organizing systematic stalking of the mother of a young child survivor.
As it is, hoaxers daily try to intimidate me. I get weird emails and friend requests. I get daily harassment in message and chat. But this is a small price to pay to ensure they don’t steal the truth and that the reality of these hoaxers become known. Compared to what they do to the parents, these thinly veiled threats to me are nothing.
I've been asked many times "Why do you do it?" I have to do it, now. I am compelled to put the truth out there; I am compelled to to fight the lies. If I don't tell the truth, who will? The press? Fat chance. Even the few press still willing to discuss Sandy Hook refuse to put in the time to get it right. Maybe the press don’t have the time to get it right; maybe they don’t care to get it right. Maybe both.
I'm proud of what I've accomplished and I feel like those few of us that are out there that have banded together to fight hoaxers are fighting one of the biggest evils perpetrated in this country. History will look back on hoaxers with the shame they deserve. Their family names forever linked to the wacko conspiracy theory they espoused. What will Wolfgang Halbig’s great grandchildren see when they search their family name? That is all they will know about their family name, like so many other hoaxers perpetrating this fraud. Thoughts like about these hoaxers are a small consolation prize compared to the pain these hoaxers cause people who buried their children.
This is CW Wade, and my mission is truth and I will document Sandy Hook and Sandy Hoaxers, because no one else will.
A research journal into the facts of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting tragedy and the subsequent hoax by the alternative media, "Sandy Hook Hoax".
Thursday, May 15, 2014
Noah Pozner Medical Exam Released
www.lenpoz.com
Lenny Pozner, father of Noah Pozner, has done a remarkable thing. I must tell you today I am sad of heart having reviewed these documents.
Lenny has released the first page of the written report by the Office of the Chief Medical Examiner. The details are horrific.
The report shows he was found Supine in Classroom 8. As you may or may not know, the bodies of the children had been removed from the restroom where they huddled by an EMT of over 30 years experience, as he checked them for signs of life.
I explained in my video, they were Triaged using a "SMART" tagging system and each victim received four assessments including EKG. This report shows the EKG tabs still affixed.
Wolfgang and Sandy Hoaxers have claimed ad nauseum that no EMS were allowed in. This report affirms my assertion to the contrary, in fact, a paramedic determined death, just as I have explained in the past.
Death was determined by Paramedics, as it shows in this report. I have explained this fact to Wolfgang, hoaxers, and the community on the radio and in video. Paramedics absolutely can perform a presumption of death and they did so with Sandy Hook victims under the direction of Dr. Broderick of Danbury Hospital.
This is not an "I told you so" to hoaxers. This is a "Get your facts right"; stop spreading misinformation and lies. While this document is new because in the report, it is redacted, the information is not. I have explained it all before because the information is in the report.
The document is signed as certified by Louis Ramaldi, on 12-15-12.
The document explains what Noah was wearing; and I recall Dr. Carver when he stated: "They were wearing kid stuff". They were indeed. Noah was wearing a red and black "Batman" sweatshirt.
I mention that today, because today I am saddened reading it.
Ladies and Gentlemen, there are 19 other parents of first graders who all have similar documents regarding the children they buried. I ask you to look at Sandy Hook, starting with a bunch of dead children and educators and work your way out. It makes it much clearer; makes it easier to work through the bad information in the press, lies by hoaxers, and perhaps let you glimpse at the grief these parents felt.
Thank you Lenny for standing up and being counted. For being willing to lay it all on the line. For helping dispel the invented event "Sandy Hoax" and allowing us an unredacted glimpse into the tragedy that befell Sandy Hook Elementary School on 12-14-12.
CW Wade
For the full size doc please visit www.lenpoz.com
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
New Adam Lanza Photo Posted on 4Chan - boards.4chan.org ?
Circulating the internet from unverified sources is a screen shot of what appears to be a thread posted to 4chan yesterday. The anonymous poster claims they played starfighter with Adam Lanza and the photo is a capture of the Sandy Hook shooter.
The OP also indicates they typed "Soon.." on it just to mess with Adam.
The obvious questions come to mind such as: why did the OP wait until May 13, 2014 to post his surprise revelation? I was unable to locate the original thread or a Cache! of the thread.
The photo is a very close match to the shooter and there have been numerous reports that Adam Lanza played Star Craft.
Interestingly, this is not the first time we have heard Adam Lanza's name in connection with .4chan's message board. Soon after the event, an anonymous post made on 4chan made it's way through news websites and blogs. It read:
“I’m going to kill myself on Friday and it will make the news. be watching at 9:00 am.”
“I live in Connecticut, that’s as much as I’ll say.”
This anonymous post was confirmed in the Connecticut Final Report; however, it was never determined that Adam Lanza made the post.
This one is unconfirmed; however, it was compelling enough to mention and keep a record of here in my research blog.
If anyone gets any info on this, please pass it along.
Original Post from 12/12/14:
The obvious questions come to mind such as: why did the OP wait until May 13, 2014 to post his surprise revelation? I was unable to locate the original thread or a Cache! of the thread.
The photo is a very close match to the shooter and there have been numerous reports that Adam Lanza played Star Craft.
Interestingly, this is not the first time we have heard Adam Lanza's name in connection with .4chan's message board. Soon after the event, an anonymous post made on 4chan made it's way through news websites and blogs. It read:
“I’m going to kill myself on Friday and it will make the news. be watching at 9:00 am.”
“I live in Connecticut, that’s as much as I’ll say.”
This anonymous post was confirmed in the Connecticut Final Report; however, it was never determined that Adam Lanza made the post.
This one is unconfirmed; however, it was compelling enough to mention and keep a record of here in my research blog.
If anyone gets any info on this, please pass it along.
Original Post from 12/12/14:
State Police Mention of this in the report:
Monday, May 12, 2014
Noah Pozner Death Certificate Released
Lenny Pozner has released Noah Pozner's Death Certificate.
For those reasonable people with doubt, these official government documents should be a wake up call at the horrific tragedy suffered by the Pozner family.
Noah Pozner, Lenny's 6 year old son was killed in Sandy Hook Elementary School on December 14, 2012. According to the Death Certificate, he died from Multiple Gun Shot Wounds.
Other documents Lenny has released include the Noah's Birth Certificate, and his two page Kindergarten Report Card from Sandy Hook Elementary School, which bear out the fact that Noah was a wonderful and smart child. Lenny Pozner has also released the medical examiners report.
Please see my related post: Lenny Pozner Setting the Record Straight and get an idea of what this nightmare has been like for this family.
Sunday, May 11, 2014
Organized Cyber Stalking of Sandy Hook Hoax Victims
A major concern of mine is the increased Cyber Stalking of Newtown families by Sandy Hoaxers.
The hoaxers are become more organized and brazen in their efforts as they organize behind Wolfgang Halbig.
I reviewed a copy of the now "Secret" meeting held by Sandy Hook Hoax and Sandy Hook Justice. This "post-Newtown meeting" contained the audio I posted before where it appears Thomas Lapp discusses his company support, including "CEO Chris", for Sandy Hook Justice's activities. More on this soon as that is a rapidly developing investigation.
I further discovered that Tony Mead and Thomas Lapp are actively engaged in the Cyber Stalking of a mother of a child survivor of the Sandy Hook Elementary School Shooting.
The leaders discussed her private information in an open online forum and they verbally or their followers to "Dig Dig Dig" into her further.
This collateral victim apparently made the mistake of being decent enough to be willing to talk to Sandy Hook Hoaxers Tony Mead and answer his questions. This is how they pay her for that courtesy.
Wolfgang Halbig actively pursuing the Identity of Sandy Hook Super Bowl Choir
Wolfgang Halbig is actively pursuing the identities of the minor children that comprise the chorus from Sandy Hook Elementary School; the 26 children who sang at the 2013 Super Bowl.
On the off chance you have been living under a rock and don't know, Hoaxers allege these children are the children who died at Sandy Hook in 2012; declaring the children to be alive. The fact the 26 children look nothing like the 20 children who were murdered and the fact the Super Bowl singers are much older than age six or seven, the age of the victims, does not deter them in the least.
Halbig himself has mentioned the Super Bowl theories, live on air. This is not about logic with them; that is why they are dangerous.
The pursuit of the identities of living minor children, so he can publish this information to his fellow hoaxers is predatory and sick behavior. Wolfgang Halbig has retained Carson City, Nevada Attorney Day Williams in a desperate attempt to make a formal attempt get the minor children's identities from the National Football League. That is beyond the pale and sick.
We all believe in the first Amendment, but is there a limit to the madness we must tolerate from the likes of Sandy Hook Conspiracy Theorist like Wolfgang Halbig? I think that limit is crossed with Cyber Stalking of the identities young minor children.
When it comes to protecting these children from the likes of Wolfgang Halbig and his predatory followers, that line has now been crossed, in this writers opinion. Nearly every day, and sometimes several times a day, Halbig posts a photo of himself armed, wearing a pistol backwards like a Wyatt Earp character. Is this a message to us? His motto is "They came to my house, no I'm going to theirs."
His post formally calling for their identities and the letter by his attorney Day Williams:
https://www.facebook.com/SandyHookJustice/posts/798186196882854
If you have any doubt as to the intent of these people, do a search:
https://www.google.com/search?q=sandy+hook+superbowl+hoax&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&client=firefox-a
On the off chance you have been living under a rock and don't know, Hoaxers allege these children are the children who died at Sandy Hook in 2012; declaring the children to be alive. The fact the 26 children look nothing like the 20 children who were murdered and the fact the Super Bowl singers are much older than age six or seven, the age of the victims, does not deter them in the least.
Halbig himself has mentioned the Super Bowl theories, live on air. This is not about logic with them; that is why they are dangerous.
The pursuit of the identities of living minor children, so he can publish this information to his fellow hoaxers is predatory and sick behavior. Wolfgang Halbig has retained Carson City, Nevada Attorney Day Williams in a desperate attempt to make a formal attempt get the minor children's identities from the National Football League. That is beyond the pale and sick.
We all believe in the first Amendment, but is there a limit to the madness we must tolerate from the likes of Sandy Hook Conspiracy Theorist like Wolfgang Halbig? I think that limit is crossed with Cyber Stalking of the identities young minor children.
When it comes to protecting these children from the likes of Wolfgang Halbig and his predatory followers, that line has now been crossed, in this writers opinion. Nearly every day, and sometimes several times a day, Halbig posts a photo of himself armed, wearing a pistol backwards like a Wyatt Earp character. Is this a message to us? His motto is "They came to my house, no I'm going to theirs."
In movies this would be called "foreshadow".
His post formally calling for their identities and the letter by his attorney Day Williams:
https://www.facebook.com/SandyHookJustice/posts/798186196882854
If you have any doubt as to the intent of these people, do a search:
https://www.google.com/search?q=sandy+hook+superbowl+hoax&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&client=firefox-a
Saturday, May 10, 2014
Lenny Pozner: Setting the Record Straight
Lenny Pozner with his children, Arielle, Noah, and Sophia.
When I first began my in-depth study of the Sandy Hook Tragedy, I was a much different person. I entertained the idea that everything was not as it seemed, I needed answers. I believed "Sandy Hoax" people were acting in good faith. I had no personal attachment to the events of that day other than generally being touched, as we all were, at the scope of the tragedy.
That is all different now. Without bragging, I consider myself one of the most well read people on the Newtown Tragedy, having studied the 7000 +/- pages, video, and photo in available report and every major "hoax theory" out there; with that knowledge, I absolutely know Adam Lanza entered that school and did the unthinkable; matched only in scope by War Crime level events. I know the leadership caste of the Sandy Hoax people are scammers, photoshopping "evidence" and overtly lying; fraudulently pushing their absurd theories to a growing crowd using Youtube and blogs as a forum for their deception and madness. And I have met online and by email a few of the people, collateral victims, personally affected that day; some of whom I've promised complete confidentiality too. I will maintain my promises to them forever. In this respect, I too am personally affected.
I've been given permission to publish a writing of Lenny Pozner. A writing that touched my heart. I have had many conversations with Lenny on the phone and by email and while we have never met face-to-face, I have a tremendous amount of respect for this man and yes, I consider him a friend.
On December 14, 2012 Lenny's remarkable son, Noah was shot and killed in Room 8 of Sandy Hook Elementary School. Noah's twin sister, Arielle, was huddled in the restroom of Classroom 12, sheltered by the quick thinking her teacher of Kaitlin Roig. His older daughter Sophia was in the classroom right next to where Adam stood ejecting live rounds onto floor of the the hallway immediately after killing Noah, Noah's teachers, and his classmates. If there had been any delay in response or things had been a little different, Lenny could have lost all three of his children that day. They were all in the immediate zone of danger.
From that day, the story is a remarkable one of perseverance and learning to live with anguish and post traumatic stress. The weight of losing a child is enough to end the will of many parents. Lenny not only took on the stress we all have, that of life and supporting a family and raising Sophia and Arielle, but he struggled against additional adversity heaped upon him by the weight of world wide interest, an eager press careless with facts, unscrupulous members of his extended family, con-artists attempting to cash in on the tragedy using his name, and the relentless attacks of Sandy Hook "Hoaxer" conspiracy theorists; many of these tribulations continue to this day.
Today, Lenny Pozner stands strong. Today, Lenny Pozner is one of the few parents of Sandy Hook that will engage you; privately he will answer your questions and do so frankly. He is not in hiding. He fights the good fight.
If you follow Lenny on Google, you will see he often posts new photos of Noah, Noah with Lenny, Noah with his mother, Noah with his sisters, other family photos, words of wisdom, interesting links and quips. Many of the photos he posts will break your heart.
Lenny has 1.5 million views on his +Google page, speaking to his willingness to allow you in. When I speak with him, I don't pretend to be able to have the words that would assuage any pain he feels. I am insignificant in comparison to his tragedy; I use my time to enjoy the conversation and to learn, not only about Sandy Hook, but about ideas and life.
I don't know how I would react to losing any of my children, least of all if any were murdered. Compound that by the months of vicious personal attacks he has withstood; I pray to God I could have one-fourth of Lenny's strength.
What is Lenny's take? Lenny says he is just a normal guy who dropped his children off at school a little late one day.
No sir. I disagree. You are a remarkable man who dropped his children at school a little late one day. You and your wife Veronique have my highest level of respect and regard.
I proudly re-post his writing, and, truth be told, do so emotionally, after having written the above.
Thank you, Lenny.
C.W. Wade
http:://www.sandyhookfacts.com
The original article is here.
You may visit Lenny's page here: www.lenpoz.com
----------------------------------------- The Article ----------------------------------------
After Tragedy, Additional Adversity for One Newtown Family
By Lenny Pozner
December 14 marked the one-year anniversary of the murder of my six-year-old son, Noah, at Sandy Hook Elementary School. High-profile anniversaries mean different things to the public than to the “Newtown parents” like me: The media is inclined to focus on stories of perseverance and progress, because that’s what the public wants to believe. The families know that healing is not a linear process. Our recovery from tragedy is detoured by unimaginable sadness, unexpected obstacles and devastating setbacks. Most days, it doesn't feel like progress at all.
Tragedy numbs you, but it also makes you alert to the kindness of neighbors and friends. In the days that followed Noah’s murder, the Newtown community came together. Friends opened up their homes to us. People helped my family and my two girls in more ways than I can describe. Their support was the norm, and we remain grateful for the community’s response.
My wife Veronique and I were so beaten down by the shockwave of grief—we were both suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)—that we really couldn't function. We faced additional challenges because Veronique and I were separated. We were living separately at that time. We shared custody, splitting the week in half. They were with me the night before. I made sure Noah and his siblings did their homework and were in bed on time. I drove Noah to school that morning.
December 14 shattered us, and left us vulnerable in ways we could not have imagined.
In the days that followed Veronique’s family flew out from the West Coast. In short order Veronique’s brother, Alexis Haller, began to meet with the media, which was hungry for any and all information on the families. He was interviewed by a number of news outlets, including the NY Daily News, the Associated Press and Anderson Cooper on CNN. In the process, we lost our voice and became spectators to our own grief.
Alexis and his wife Victoria established a website to solicit donations for our family, a trust fund for the children, and created a mailing address in Newtown for correspondence that was forwarded to them in Washington state. Victoria, who hardly knew my son, began tweeting and blogging about Noah and directing potential donors to the website. The public responded graciously, sending donations, made out to Veronique and me, or the Pozner family, along with sympathy mail and toys and teddy bears for my children. Unfortunately, none of these items made their way to us. My brother-in-law, who also hardly knew Noah, anointed himself the family spokesman and decision maker.
A series of family disputes ensued, many of which have played out in the press. When we attempted to access the donations, Alexis and his wife would not release them. We had to hire an attorney in early 2013 to gain access to and control over what rightfully belonged to our family. Still, Alexis continued to appear before the media even though I had asked him repeatedly in December and January to stop. Finally, in February we had to appeal to the press to say Alexis’ comments were his own and did not represent the views of my family. His behavior made our unimaginable hell even worse.
There were other difficulties that did not make the news, thankfully. A month or so after Noah’s murder, Veronique received a letter from her ex-husband attempting to gain more control of finances based on their divorce 13 years earlier. He threatened to take her to court.
At about the same time, I was sued by someone with whom I had a business dispute three years earlier. When he read that a charity was distributing several million dollars to the Sandy Hook families, he assumed every family was receiving millions of dollars and sued me for $100,000. By this point Veronique and I had engaged multiple attorneys: two to deal with Alexis, one for the ex-husband, and one for my ex-business associate, all while mending a fractured marriage, and tending to a parent in the last stages of a terminal illness. We moved through our days in a fog.
These problems were unique to our household. Others affected all the Newtown families. The media coverage, for example, was often inaccurate, especially with regard to the details around the shooting, sometimes fueling crazy conspiracy theorists I've read about and encountered.
Earlier this year, I stopped at a major chain hotel with my family in tow. I was in the process of registering when the twenty-something girl at the counter looked at my driver’s license and said, “Oh, Sandy Hook. The government did that.” I was able to shrug it off—she obviously didn't know who I was—but it was painful to hear such a misguided opinion.
Such attitudes are driven in part by inaccuracies in the media. One article in the Jewish Daily Forward written the day after the shooting stated that Noah had been shot 11 times, which was untrue. I asked the reporter to make a correction and she refused. This inaccuracy became a fact that was repeated in future coverage, referenced numerous times as an extreme example of crimes committed with semi-automatic weapons. I even heard that politicians referenced it in their speeches, using this ‘fact’ to further their agendas. But this was my son they were talking about, and they were getting it wrong.
Finally, there are the inevitable scams. Nouel Alba, a woman in the Bronx, posed as Noah’s aunt—Alexis’ wife Victoria Haller—and solicited donations for what she referred to as a “funeral fund.” In truth, Noah was buried within two days of the shooting, as is Jewish tradition. In October of this year, Alba was convicted of fraud and sentenced to eight months in prison.
Veronique and I no longer live in the Newtown area. After December 14, it was apparent we would need to start a new life elsewhere. The murder of our son brought us back together. The life we were living before December 14 no longer applied. Whatever our values were back then—whatever compelled us to seek a divorce—was no longer important to us on December 15.
Now, as we close in on the anniversary, the days get even harder. On November 20 we celebrated the seventh birthday of Noah’s twin sister, Arielle, and that was very tough. We made it a positive day because it’s her birthday. We had a cake for Arielle and we added seven candles for Noah. Arielle made a wish for herself and another for Noah.
We are braced for the wave of attention that will inevitably accompany this horrific anniversary. We know we can do nothing to stop it. We know that this attention will focus on things that have more to do with various agendas and pat conclusions than with the murder victims, including Noah, who would have just turned seven.
As draining as 2013 has been for me and Veronique, we are optimistic that the worst is behind us. We will finally properly honor and mourn Noah. A killer took from us our son, and family members took from us our energy to grieve, but no one can take away our memories of Noah and our determination to keep him alive in our hearts.
Lenny Pozner
By Lenny Pozner
December 14 marked the one-year anniversary of the murder of my six-year-old son, Noah, at Sandy Hook Elementary School. High-profile anniversaries mean different things to the public than to the “Newtown parents” like me: The media is inclined to focus on stories of perseverance and progress, because that’s what the public wants to believe. The families know that healing is not a linear process. Our recovery from tragedy is detoured by unimaginable sadness, unexpected obstacles and devastating setbacks. Most days, it doesn't feel like progress at all.
Tragedy numbs you, but it also makes you alert to the kindness of neighbors and friends. In the days that followed Noah’s murder, the Newtown community came together. Friends opened up their homes to us. People helped my family and my two girls in more ways than I can describe. Their support was the norm, and we remain grateful for the community’s response.
My wife Veronique and I were so beaten down by the shockwave of grief—we were both suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)—that we really couldn't function. We faced additional challenges because Veronique and I were separated. We were living separately at that time. We shared custody, splitting the week in half. They were with me the night before. I made sure Noah and his siblings did their homework and were in bed on time. I drove Noah to school that morning.
December 14 shattered us, and left us vulnerable in ways we could not have imagined.
In the days that followed Veronique’s family flew out from the West Coast. In short order Veronique’s brother, Alexis Haller, began to meet with the media, which was hungry for any and all information on the families. He was interviewed by a number of news outlets, including the NY Daily News, the Associated Press and Anderson Cooper on CNN. In the process, we lost our voice and became spectators to our own grief.
Alexis and his wife Victoria established a website to solicit donations for our family, a trust fund for the children, and created a mailing address in Newtown for correspondence that was forwarded to them in Washington state. Victoria, who hardly knew my son, began tweeting and blogging about Noah and directing potential donors to the website. The public responded graciously, sending donations, made out to Veronique and me, or the Pozner family, along with sympathy mail and toys and teddy bears for my children. Unfortunately, none of these items made their way to us. My brother-in-law, who also hardly knew Noah, anointed himself the family spokesman and decision maker.
A series of family disputes ensued, many of which have played out in the press. When we attempted to access the donations, Alexis and his wife would not release them. We had to hire an attorney in early 2013 to gain access to and control over what rightfully belonged to our family. Still, Alexis continued to appear before the media even though I had asked him repeatedly in December and January to stop. Finally, in February we had to appeal to the press to say Alexis’ comments were his own and did not represent the views of my family. His behavior made our unimaginable hell even worse.
There were other difficulties that did not make the news, thankfully. A month or so after Noah’s murder, Veronique received a letter from her ex-husband attempting to gain more control of finances based on their divorce 13 years earlier. He threatened to take her to court.
At about the same time, I was sued by someone with whom I had a business dispute three years earlier. When he read that a charity was distributing several million dollars to the Sandy Hook families, he assumed every family was receiving millions of dollars and sued me for $100,000. By this point Veronique and I had engaged multiple attorneys: two to deal with Alexis, one for the ex-husband, and one for my ex-business associate, all while mending a fractured marriage, and tending to a parent in the last stages of a terminal illness. We moved through our days in a fog.
These problems were unique to our household. Others affected all the Newtown families. The media coverage, for example, was often inaccurate, especially with regard to the details around the shooting, sometimes fueling crazy conspiracy theorists I've read about and encountered.
Earlier this year, I stopped at a major chain hotel with my family in tow. I was in the process of registering when the twenty-something girl at the counter looked at my driver’s license and said, “Oh, Sandy Hook. The government did that.” I was able to shrug it off—she obviously didn't know who I was—but it was painful to hear such a misguided opinion.
Such attitudes are driven in part by inaccuracies in the media. One article in the Jewish Daily Forward written the day after the shooting stated that Noah had been shot 11 times, which was untrue. I asked the reporter to make a correction and she refused. This inaccuracy became a fact that was repeated in future coverage, referenced numerous times as an extreme example of crimes committed with semi-automatic weapons. I even heard that politicians referenced it in their speeches, using this ‘fact’ to further their agendas. But this was my son they were talking about, and they were getting it wrong.
Finally, there are the inevitable scams. Nouel Alba, a woman in the Bronx, posed as Noah’s aunt—Alexis’ wife Victoria Haller—and solicited donations for what she referred to as a “funeral fund.” In truth, Noah was buried within two days of the shooting, as is Jewish tradition. In October of this year, Alba was convicted of fraud and sentenced to eight months in prison.
Veronique and I no longer live in the Newtown area. After December 14, it was apparent we would need to start a new life elsewhere. The murder of our son brought us back together. The life we were living before December 14 no longer applied. Whatever our values were back then—whatever compelled us to seek a divorce—was no longer important to us on December 15.
Now, as we close in on the anniversary, the days get even harder. On November 20 we celebrated the seventh birthday of Noah’s twin sister, Arielle, and that was very tough. We made it a positive day because it’s her birthday. We had a cake for Arielle and we added seven candles for Noah. Arielle made a wish for herself and another for Noah.
We are braced for the wave of attention that will inevitably accompany this horrific anniversary. We know we can do nothing to stop it. We know that this attention will focus on things that have more to do with various agendas and pat conclusions than with the murder victims, including Noah, who would have just turned seven.
As draining as 2013 has been for me and Veronique, we are optimistic that the worst is behind us. We will finally properly honor and mourn Noah. A killer took from us our son, and family members took from us our energy to grieve, but no one can take away our memories of Noah and our determination to keep him alive in our hearts.
Lenny Pozner
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